Words from my brain-pan.

My dog is the shit. No lie. Except when she poos. On my bed. Sadly this happened, but it was Hi-Larious! So the roomies had ordered some take out or something and the delivery dude came to my door. No biggie. Except I had just gotten out of the shower so I’m running around in my towel, going “Who the fuck is at the door?!” Because, really I had no one coming over. I was all confused and then that just discombobulates me and makes me run around like a chicken with my head cut off. It also does the same thing to Dog-Face. She was freaking out as only a 12 pound terrier can. There was much with the barking and scuttling and slipping (have I mentioned the abundance of hardwood flooring which puts poor Dog-Face in slip ‘n slide mode? So funny!) and tongue wagging. Well the roomies popped out of their entrance and got delivery dude’s attention about that time. Thank goodness, I was in my room frantically trying to clothe myself and calm dog down at the same time. Then poor Dog-Face looked at me, let out a full body shudder and poo’ed on the bed. *sigh* LAUNDRY DAY!!! This was the aftermath, apparently a full freak out is exhausting.

 

OMG freak outs are so tiring…

Also, this is totally going to be stream of consciousness blogging right now, I live on a nature preserve apparently. Which is cool as hell, but vaguely disconcerting when you go out the back door to inhale some fresh oxygen and see Roger the Deer, chillaxing. Roger is all, “Hey man, what’s up? I like this grass you got going on. Make sure not to cut it?” Ok maybe not, but that’s what he said in my brain.

 

Hey…nice grass..

Ok, last rant. At least for today. I finished The Claiming of Sleeping Beautyand I know why I didn’t like it. I’m going to be all serious here for a mo. Well, only kinda. So obviously, I didn’t like the part of the story I had already read, which was really sad to me, because I love some good sexy time reading. My biggest ish with it was the fact it wasn’t voluntary submission. Yep. That bothered me and my delicate (hahahahah) senses the most. So the premise is you have Super Dominant Prince dude, who btw, I think may have boned his mother…not sure, but I totally got that impression. Anyway. Super Dominant Prince dude (SDPd from now on, that’s so much easier to type) gets these princesses and princes as tributes (not Hunger Games style) from other kingdoms to “train” them. So these kids’ folks are sending them off to the SDPd for training that will help them rule. Therein lays my issue. Ummm no one chose this! The subs all had to be broken. Like they fought back and had to be beaten/raped/tortured into submission. Ok and maybe this is just me projecting (because I may or may not have had an ex who stated he wanted to break me, not like physically, but emotionally) and that’s why I can’t find any sexy time in what was described in the books. *tear* And end scene. (Once again I’m going to throw out this disclaimer: I DON’T GIVE TWO FUCKS IF YOU LIKE TO BE A SUB it makes no matter to me. Hell, we could even be best buddies. So I’m not judging you. Ever.)

Oh! OH! OHHH!!! I lied about the above being my last rant because I would just like to call out my buddy Ken Beil (remember, his name is not Ken Beil, because that would be mean, and babycakes, I’m sweet as sugar) because DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE SAID? He was kind of disappointed that I had a good date!!!! Bah hahahaha! Ok, I get the disappointment; obviously this blog is dedicated to my epic dating fails, but for serious? C’mon buddy, be happy I had a good time! (And before you get all up in arms on my behalf loves [which I totally appreciate and adore you for] I’m just giving him shit, because I know he doesn’t mean it. Because if he did mean it, that will kill the baked goods train, known as me.) So, you were kidding….right Ken?

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One Response to Words from my brain-pan.

  1. Marci says:

    Once upon a time, I got out of the shower and saw a van park down the street. Out came what was obviously a group of fine folks intent on spreading the good news. I decided right then and there that if they came to my door I WOULD answer it naked. Sad day, as I received no callers. Better luck next time.

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