Shit. Kinda literally

OMG kids, it’s been forever. Worst part? I don’t really have much to report! I have a kinda boring story I can share. So that’s what I’m going to do.

So, I had been chatting with this dude on my free dating site for awhile, let’s call him Apollo (and not because he looks like a Greek god either) and we decided to go have lunch together. Now, despite what my date on Saturday said about lunch dates (I’ll get into that later) I like the idea. Because let’s face it, I’m normally bored with a first date in the first 30 minutes. With a lunch date? It’s only an hour, maximum and it can always be cut short! Apollo and I have been on about 3 lunch dates at this point and I’m going to break them down for you;

Date #1- Italian (ok, it was pizza and salad)

He was there early and waiting for me outside. Nice, I like that, it’s classy. On the first date, I found out that he does a lot of lunch dates (due to his work shift) which is awkward for him, because on good dates he only gets that weird kiss on the side of the mouth. Oh ok, well I’m sorry for you. That sucks. I mean, what do you say to that? Well, then we get seated (tee hee, yep that was like the second thing he said to me.) And he’s nervous, or at least that’s what I’m going with, and just starts yammering on, which is find, because I get to learn all sorts of interesting things AND enjoy my salad. WIN. So, here’s what I found out: dude likes DnD which is a bonus (don’t judge, I’ve been known to roll a D20), he only hangs out with high school friends (hmm, that one’s kind of awkward, I mean I do when I’m up home, but he’s not local), he’s broke (I find it weird to talk money on the first date, broke or loaded, I don’t even know if I want a second date at this point so the whole $$ freaks me out), and at one point during lunch he dropped marinara on his second best polo (yep, I learned this AND that he ruined his very best polo with something or another the previous day). So, I learned a lot, but wasn’t horribly impressed. I wasn’t repulsed or terrified, so this is a step in the right direction. Then the bill comes. I’m all set to go splitsies, because, well Apollo was just bitching about not having any money and needing to borrow from a friend for a night out. But he tells the waitress, “One check.” Ok then, you got this! Well Apollo, that suave son of a bitch, looks at the bill and says, “This is too expensive, I can’t cover this!” Fuck, I knew this was coming, but it still throws me for a loop, every time. However, I also decide, fuck this shit, he can deal with it. (Once again loves, I’d like to remind you that I’m not a particularly expensive date, because I don’t like being a bitch and if you can’t afford a whopping $6.50 bill you have no business asking a chick out IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!!). But, I digress. So I just give him THE LOOK and wait to see what happens. He back tracks and pulls the whole “Ha ha just kidding” card to which I do not laugh.  The date is over at this point so I give him a hug and head on back to work. I will say it was nice to get out of the office for a bit.

Date #2- Mexican

I’ll give Apollo this, he’s persistent. He asked me out to lunch again and I said yes. I had been chatting with my coworker about the date and my coworker suggested giving Apollo a second chance.  So I did. We went for Mexican and it was a much nicer experience. I don’t remember anything standing out, but we had fun. Well enough fun that I said yes to a third lunch date. OH one thing did stand out- Apollo works with poop and therefore tends to talk about it a lot.

Date #3- burger joint

Well at this point, I was kind of leaning toward uninterested; post 2nd date (also, since we’re only doing lunch dates here, do they even count as 3? Would it still technically be 1? Whatevs.) I had learned about his bowl movements and that made me uncomfortable. I mean it was over sharing and I didn’t like it. So I sat and listened about some event he had gone to over the weekend and wasn’t that interested. I did learn that his cholesterol is high. Or maybe it was his triglycerides. It’s not really any of my business. So, I could maybe have dinner with this dude and his poop talk (though he doesn’t really like to rearrange his weekend schedule to include date time) or I can just let it die. I’m going with option number 2.

BUT (I was lying when I said I didn’t have anything to share. Technically I really didn’t have anything until this weekend) I did go on an amazing date.

Yep, I had a good date, with a dude, it lasted over 10 hours (which I’m pretty sure actually qualifies as 3 dates rolled into one), and *fingers crossed* we’re going out again tomorrow. So here’s the run down on this guy. He has the following:

–          A sense of humor

–          Intelligence

–          A car

–          A job

–          His own place (I’m guessing, but he was talking about not having roomies, so I’m going to say yeah)

–          A beard

–          Dimples

–          A great smile

–          Good taste in music (what? Don’t judge, it’s nice.)

–          Strong fingers (what?! I got a hand massage. Get your mind out of the gutter! Or not, I mean, you do whatever you want baby)

–          Nice lips (HA! Yes, I do know this.)

–          He makes me smile.

Now, here are the only issues:

–          He lives about an hour and a half away (I mean it has both plusses and minuses, but for now, it’s in the “dang it” category.

–          He has a kid. Ok so this isn’t an issue, it’s just new territory for me. I’ve never dated anyone with a kid. I mean, look at me jumping the gun, a 10 hour date does not a relationship make, I know this.  But assuming he comes up to visit tomorrow and things go well and progress to an actual relationship, this will be a new thing for me. And it’s terrifying.

That’s it! I mean so far. Of course maybe I’m so over the moon to be interested in someone who’s interested in me that I’m overlooking a bunch of shit. Which is probably possible, but I’m going go out on a limb and say fuck it. I kind of want to jump in with both feet. Jesus, not like move in with a dude, but more of a, holy shit we like each other, let’s keep it going. I mean I know it’s not cool to be so open or eager, but once again I don’t give a shit; ain’t nobody got time for games. Seriously, I hate them and refuse to play them, if I like you I’ll tell you as much as let you know I want to see you again. Why is this weird?

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