Fuck your twist M. Night Shyamallama, it sucked.

So…I have good news and then I’m confused news. The good news is that the cool dude my friend introduced me to wasn’t kidnapped by former KGB operatives. So YAY. I’m glad, because my understanding is that the Gulags aren’t nice, even this time of year (crazy, right?) Apparently there were some drama llama-ings….which happens. I think for about 2 months this was me with The Ex, but I quickly got over that shit. But now I don’t really know what that means, I sent him a text a few hours ago and we’ll see if he responds. Because, really, friends are nice to have. Especially single friends. Not that I don’t adore my married/taken friends, but it gets to be a bit much at times. Which brings me to another rant.

Holy shit kids, I had a weird thing happen to me a few weeks ago. I was hanging out with the usual gang who I adore. I mean really, this is the family of my choosing, but all of a sudden I felt like an outsider. No one did or said anything, but I mean, I’m on a completely different sphere than everyone I hang out with. All of them fall into 2(ish) categories:

1. Married with kids

2. Married (or at least in long term relationships)

I don’t really have anything to talk about with them. I mean, hey guys, guess what, I’m hung over on a Wednesday because I had nothing better to do than go out and try and pick up randos at the bar Tuesday night. Blarf. Even my married friends sans kids don’t do that because, well they’re fucking married and don’t need to pick up randos. I don’t own a home, want to buy one, or reproduce. Ok I want to have kids, but since that’s not going to happen, I have to find other things to look for. I don’t have anyone to go home to and quite frankly the closest thing I have at the end of the day when I need to vent (because as much as I schluff on on my roomies, its not their jobs and they have other shit on their plates) I go talk to my local bartender. (Yeah, I’ve hit on a bartender or two, I think they hope I’m drunk enough to forget I gave them my number. I’m not, but I let it go anyway.)

Ugh, I can’t even go get a random person’s opinion on shit right now, because I’m old as fuck and threw my back out WHEN MY DOG DECIDED TO CHANGE SLEEPING POSITIONS.

She looks guilty as fuck doesn't she?

She looks guilty as fuck doesn’t she?

Yep, woke up yesterday and was completely unable to move by midday. I went to a chiropractor who cracked the fuck out of my lower back, zapped me with some shocky shit, talked about the tilt of my pelvic bone, and gave me a back brace. (Yes, I’m wearing the stupid brace right now….it does see to help with the pain and also means I don’t want to go to the bar).

But what to know what I think really helped it? The muscle relaxers I took last night. Gah I got such a good nights sleep (maybe I slept in the brace, what?) and felt much better today. However, I will say that working at a computer all day while sitting in a semi broken (which is less broken than the rest of them) chair isn’t doing my lower back any favors. Anyone know what will happen if I mix lambic with those pills? I’m guessing only good things. Heh heh heh.

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